Have you ever asked, what have I done to drive God away and why would God leave me? What have I done is always a question of innocence wanting to know what you should have done. Not long ago when I woke up in the middle of the night and felt like God was a million miles away. Automatically, I went into a search mode looking for something to blame this feeling onto. My mind, went blank looking for a reason to explain why I felt that way, only to realize that there wasnít a satisfactory reason.
I know that Jesus Christ lives in my heart, so why do I feel as if God were a million miles away? I was reminded of a verse in Isaiah where God said these people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Isaiah 29:13. When I felt as God were a million miles away, I found that it was I who was away from God. While my body was the temple of God, my mind was focused on the trials of daily life. I was focused on the trials and some how my relationship with God faded into obscurity. I felt as if God were a million miles away, but I had also excluded God from my daily routine.
Turning your face towards God does not mean that you drop everything you are doing. It means putting aside everything that hinders your walk with God and spend time and effort to make a relationship with God grow. The first commandment of Godís law demands that we love God with all of your heart, mind, soul, and strength, the very attributes the world competes for. There is a tug of war for your life in both spiritual and physical worlds. The world demands that you are become astute in its ways and practices, while God wants to make you into a respectable person that will go places and do things for the people he loves.
Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent. John 17:3.
There is a reason for knowing God, but on the other hand, the world wants just enough of you to arouse Godís jealousy.
Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God. Or do you think Scripture says without reason that the spirit he caused to live in us envies intensely? James 4:4-5
Its a struggle not to become friendly with the worldís practices and consume our time for them. God wants all of you, not just what you can give when you have free time. On the other hand, people need to know that God is near and find safety in his arms. Most people know that you can live with a companion so long that your senses grow accustomed to their presence. Consider also that you ignore the sights, sounds and smell of the work place and your home when they become a normal part of your life. When the normal routine of life is broken, such as the loss of the job or a lifetime friend dies, their loss to you is like riding an emotional roller coaster where you lose effective control to make sound decisions.
Should we place our trust in the feeling that God is a million miles away? Feelings can be manipulated and Satan will use specific feelings against you. Your feelings affect you both physically and spiritually and certain conditions affect the way you perceive life and can alter the decisions you make. Your feelings are often impressions that move you to respond accordingly, therefore it is important to calmly seek God always. What we donít understand is that God can stir the heart to obey him while Satan incites Godís people to sin. Impressions come in many forms and the spiritual man must come to grips with who or what is guiding his feelings.
Where is God and how do we know that God is a million miles away? We donít always have the time to answer questions like this before we should place trust in our feelings. Perhaps we need to ask whether our feelings are an impression of faith or of doubt that forces you ask that question? Where God is in your relationship should be a matter of faith and your confidence in Godís word. Feelings can be manipulated as easily as a gray sky makes the day dreary. If we were to trust God and seek him diligently he would be exactly where he said he would be.
Jesus replied, "If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him. John 14:23
The answer is never easy because in the back of your mind you will always be looking for something to blame. Instead of finding something to blame, use your time to seek God while he may be found and find trust to believe God. God is never a million miles away, but you need to do what it takes to keep God close to you.
God has promised to never forsake us as long as we do not leave him. Could it be that God is on the same page with us, but we are not in tune with God? Taking God for granted is something most Christians do, but remember that every intimate relationship needs going the extra mile to revitalize the relationship. Both partners of the relationship need to feel loved and perhaps you have been neglecting to love God. There is nothing wrong with feeling that God is far away. It is an alarm, a wake up call to renew a fading relationship with God. h